The Four Streams of Healing

As a follower of Christ and as a Therapist; I am always asking the question, "How does God bring transformation to me and others?" Why are so many in the Christian Community not overcoming hardships and developing character in their lives?

John Eldredge has layed out in his ministry Four Streams that God uses in our lives that bring about healing and character change. In order to experience transformation, we need to be developing all four streams. The stream of Walking with God, hearing his voice, developing wisdom in our daily lives, being about the work of his Kingdom. The stream of Spiritual Warfare. God has an enemy and we have an enemy, Satan, the prince of this world, who is bent on stealing, killing and destroying anything that is good, holy and lifegiving. The stream of Counseling in which God brings truth to our inmost parts where lies and false beliefs have formed. The stream of Deep Restoration, where God goes into wounded places inside and brings his healing power to set us free.

I want to focus on one stream at a time, so this blog will focus on the stream of "Walking With God. Walking with God is a daily practise of getting quiet and hearing his voice. What gets in the way of hearing his voice, is our "false self" voice, the part of us that poses so people will accept us and love us. Also, the enemy can suggest to us a distorted interpretation of scriptures- think of legalism, phariseeism and Jesus being tempted in the desert. The enemy can also tempt us with the pleasures and worries of day to day life. Well-meaning friends and spiritual leaders can give us good advice but not necessarily what God is speaking to us (think of Job's friends).

Discerning God's voice from all other voices is no easy task. We must be aware of these other voices and be aware that God thinks so differently than we do. I always think of how God gave the Isrealites the Sabbath and then Jesus comes and brings truth to what God really meant by the Sabbath, not what the religious leaders had turned it into. Of course, we need to always check out what we are hearing and make sure it does not go against the written word of God. This is tricky, because sometimes how the Bible has been interpreted is not really what the scriptures are saying.

An example of this is the "name it and claim it" gospel. Jesus did say "whatever you ask for in prayer you shall have", but what did he really mean by this? Fortunately, we have the entire Bible to understand what Jesus meant and even Jesus' own words....."it is harder for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God". So an important part of hearing from God is knowing his character; He is love, justice, mercy, grace, and truth. He is all-knowing and powerful; He is the Great I AM. We are trying to have Kingdom thinking, which is a totally different mindset than what most of us were raised in depending on the family and societal influences we had.

The hardest part for me in hearing God's voice is slowing my busyness down in order to tune into the Holy Spirit which resides in my spirit. I am definetly a Martha who longs to be a Mary! Currently, I am trying to meditate on God's word, rather than do a Bible Study or just read the scriptures. I am going through the Gospel of Mark, because normally I would gravitate towards the Gospel of John. I am reading one chapter at a time. As I am reading, I am asking God to highlight the passage He wants me to focus on. Then after I know the context of the passage; I meditate on it, reading it over and over, leaving time and space for God to teach me what the passage means and how it applies to my life in the present time. Then, throughout the day, I ask God to help me walk in the truth of what He has just revealed to me. Often, this mean confronting false beliefs that I hold that interfere with God's Kingdom mentality.

I will give you an example of this from one of the passages I have read lately. Mark 4: 39-41 This is a passage about the story of Jesus asleep in the boat with his disciples while a killer storm is raging.

" The disciples woke him and said to him, “Teacher, don’t you care if we drown?”

He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Quiet! Be still!” Then the wind died down and it was completely calm.

He said to his disciples, “Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?”

They were terrified and asked each other, “Who is this? Even the wind and the waves obey him!”

What I was struck with in this is "what is my default position when a storm hits?" The disciples default was "God, don't you care about us....." Jesus challenges this thinking, what you believe about God determines how you will handle this storm.

This is key because we all have and will continue to experience the storms of life! Being a Christian does not mean God eliminates the storms. Instead, He uses the storms to teach us about Him, about ourselves and about how to be overcomers on Planet Earth. How do I view the storms God allows in my life? What is God trying to teach me? What is he needing to transform in me? What do I believe about God in this storm? My default is "I am on my own".

Of course, God wants me to grow and mature, he doesn't do it all for me, but I am definetly not on my own. He can be my Rock and Refuge, my Deliverer, my Knight in Shining Armour. Do I really believe I am His Beloved? This is one of the ways God is transforming me, by changing on a deep level my faulty belief system! The more I understand the truth about Him and his view towards me and others, the more I can weather the storms in my life! Not only weather them, but be an overcomer, not on my own but by my faith in God and His deep love for me. He is a Good Father, and He is after my healing and teaching me how to live life abundantly.

Blessed are the Poor in Spirit

This is a great article that goes deeper into what Jesus meant by poor in spirit. It is worth reading!

http://sethearl.wordpress.com/2006/09/18/blessed-are-the-poor-in-spirit-–-finding-life-through-honoring-god-as-our-creator/

God as Deliverer.....

God%20as%20Deliverer

Longing

I have climbed the highest mountains
I have run through the fields
Only to be with you....Only to be with you
I have run... I have crawled
I have scaled these city walls...these city walls
Only to be with you

But I still haven't found...What I'm looking for

But I still haven't found...What I'm looking for

I have kissed honey lips....Felt the healing fingertips
It burned like fire....This burning desire
I have spoke with the tongue of angels
I have held the hand of a devil
It was warm in the night...I was cold as a stone

But I still haven't found....What I'm looking for

But I still haven't found...What I'm looking for

I believe in the Kingdom Come
Then all the colors will bleed into one.....bleed into one
But yes I'm still running.
You broke the bonds
And you loosened the chains
Carried the cross
And my shame...And my shame
You know I believed it

But I still haven't found...What I'm looking for

But I still haven't found...What I'm looking for

I have climbed the highest mountains
I have run through the fields
Only to be with you...Only to be with you
I have run... I have crawled...
I have scaled these city walls...these city walls
Only to be with you


But I still haven't found...What I'm looking for

But I still haven't found...What I'm looking for

But I still haven't found...What I'm looking for


But I still haven't found....What I'm looking for

Song by U2, "I Still haven't found What I'm looking for"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r07tUdgzCbk

The two songs I put in this blog, I think captures the very heart of each of our journey in finding meaning and purpose in our lives. The U2 song speaks to our longing.... We are meant for something deeper, that we are searching for something so much it makes our hearts ache. The second song by Leeland reflects that deeper something that can be discovered and experienced - having a love relationship with God. I have been a Christian for 32 years, and continue to feel that longing for deeper love. This longing and yearning has led me to a deeper intimacy with God. .....

To fall hopelessly, madly in love with God and experience that He is hopelessly and madly in love with each one of us.

I can't believe You're here close to me

It's getting hard to stand.... But I don't want to leave

Your beauty stands out... Like a bright light shining through the clouds

It's overwhelming just to be with You now...

I can't stop,

I can't stop falling in love with You

I can't stop, I can't stop falling in love with You

Your love is in my heart tonight (yes, I know)

I can't stop, I can't stop falling in love with You

I'm in love with You


In this space and time ...You touch my soul

I can't escape Your love for me

So You take control ....Your spirit surrounds me

Close enough to catch me when I fall
I can't escape Your love for me

I surrender all
You've risen like the sun ...Darkness fades with the dawn

You are the radiant one... And You give me light
Your love is in my heart tonight

Your love is in my heart tonight

I can't stop, I can't stop falling in love with You

I can't stop, I can't stop falling in love with You

Song by Leeland, "Can't Stop"

http://www.rhapsody.com/player?type=track&id=tra.11115063&remote=false&page=&pageregion=&guid=&from=&hasrhapx=false&__pcode=

“Should Christians Seek Professional Counseling?”

This was written by Blaine Carman, M.A., Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who is a part of our team at Four Streams Christian Counseling.

We are living in challenging times with a great deal of uncertainty. This uncertainty can breed anxiety, resulting in behavior which is both self-destructive and harmful to our relationships. Within a marriage, it may cause couples to experience distance from one another and to have conflicts they cannot seem to understand or resolve.

Our faith in God is sometimes tested during these times. Sometimes it’s hard to discern God’s will for us during times of crisis or challenges in specific areas of our lives, such as our jobs, relationships, or our financial situation. Or sometimes we may even have a sense of what Jesus would like us to do in a particular situation, but we have a hard time actually carrying it out.

The Bible gives us the blueprint for life. At times, though, we struggle with how to apply the blueprint because of habits and patterns from our past that still drive our behavior. Even though we have new life in Christ, we can still have habits of communicating or acting toward others in ways which are not very Christ-like, resulting in painful results. Since some of these habits have been learned over a lifetime, it can take a specific process to help “undo them” and allow us to truly give them to God.

This is where professional Christian counseling can help. Together, with the help of God, a professional Christian counselor can help support a person in letting go of some of those patterns so that they can more fully live the life God intended for them. Counseling can help us to better understand our unique issues and to discover solutions that lead us back to individual and family harmony and a deeper connection with God.

Do you know how many times the word “counselor” is mentioned in the Bible? More than 500 times. And Jesus himself was known as the Wonderful Counselor. The Bible teaches us to seek “wise counsel” in times of trouble. Therefore, whether you’re going through a challenging time or just feel you need an outside perspective to gain clarity about what you’re dealing with, consider consulting a professional Christian counselor. This may be a way of God reaching out to you.

Does the sinful nature cancel out our value?

I was reading a blog by John Eldgrege in which he talked about how many Christians have accepted the doctrine that we have no intrinsic worth as human beings. He was sharing how misguided this viewpoint is and that it gives us a false picture of God and of ourselves. I have always believed that we had value and worth because we were created in the image of God. I have also wondered does our sinful nature somehow cancel out our value and worth. There is a teaching in many Christian circles that "we are flithy rags", there is nothing good in us. Is this true is there nothing good in us?

Let's look at the scripture in context in which the phrase "filthy rags" is used in Isaiah 64: 4-9.

4For from days of old they have not heard or perceived by ear,

Nor has the eye seen a God besides You,

Who acts in behalf of the one who waits for Him.

5You meet him who rejoices in doing righteousness,

Who remembers You in Your ways

Behold, You were angry, for we sinned,

We continued in them a long time;

And shall we be saved?

6For all of us have become like one who is unclean,

And all our righteous deeds are like a filthy garment;

And all of us wither like a leaf,

And our iniquities, like the wind, take us away.

7There is no one who calls on Your name,

Who arouses himself to take hold of You;

For You have hidden Your face from us

And have delivered us into the power of our iniquities.

8But now, O LORD,

You are our Father,

We are the clay, and You our potter;

And all of us are the work of Your hand.

9Do not be angry beyond measure, O LORD,

Nor remember iniquity forever;

Behold, look now, all of us are Your people.

This scripture points to God's people's righteous deeds are like filthy garments. They are still valuable to God but He is angry at their continuing in sin. When one of my children is mean to his brother or disrespectful towards me, I correct this behavior. I know that this behavior is not a good habit to get into and will cause him problems if he continues in it. I have not stopped loving him, but I do know that this is not behavior that is good for him. God was angered that his people were living in their sin for too long, were not turning to Him, had forgotten His ways. This is why God hates sin and can have no part of it. Sin causes pain and destruction in the world we live in. Sin also takes us away from the one who loves us with an undying love--God, our Heavenly Father. Sin taints our value and worth. We still have our intrinsic worth but our sin interferes with us living out who God intends us to be.

God can have no part of sin, so our sin seperates us from God. Countless scriptures point to this concept. Do a key word search in the Bible on evil, you will understand God's feelings and thoughts on evil. "You are not a God who takes pleasure in evil; with you the wicked cannot dwell. (Psalm5:4). "I, wisdom, dwell together with prudence; I possess knowledge and discretion. To fear the LORD is to hate evil; I hate pride and arrogance, evil behavior and perverse speech. (Proverbs 8:12-13).

This does not mean that he does not love us or want to be near us. Our sin becomes a barrier that God must deliver us from in order for us to have relationship with Him.
It is not who we are as human beings that he hates....it is our sin. Isaiah says that God's people are the work of His hands that makes us extremely valuable. Isaiah says this in the same chapter in which it is spoken of their righteous acts are like filthy rags. We were created by God and in His Image and God said that all he created was good (Genesis 1). Psalm 139 says that we were designed by God in our mother's womb, that we are beautifully and wonderfully made.

God wants to be near us, spend time with us, he longs for us to know him and he longs for us to share ourselves with him. But, there is this dilema, he can have no part of evil and we have been corrupted by evil. This happened when Adam and Eve (perfect human beings who had perfect intimacy with God) chose to eat of the tree of good and evil when they were tempted by Satan. (Genesis 3).

He loved us so much and so greatly detested evil that he devised a plan to conquer evil and win back his true love. You know the "greatest love story ever told" of God sending his son to earth born as a baby and becoming a man and living a sinless life in perfect communion with God the Father. This perfect man of true love who came as our Messiah was loved by some, rejected by the masses and religious leaders and killed. His death paid the penalty of our sin! He was then raised to life conquering death and evil once and for all. (Romans 8:1-4).

Here's the amazing part! God's beautifully and wonderfully made creation, You and me, are freed from the corruption of sin when we accept the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. We still contend with the sinful nature, but God has declared us righteous! II Corinthians 5:17 states that "We are New Creations"! "For if, by the trespass of the one man, death reigned through that one man, how much more will those who receive God's abundant provision of grace and of the gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man, Jesus Christ (Romans 5:17). Wow, talk about Good News!

Why does it matter that we are are valuable in God's eyes? What is the importance of this distinction between our worth and our sin? How does it feel to hear that you are valuable? What did you want to hear growing up? What was special about you, or how badly you were screwing up? We are trying to help our kids make wise choices that will create confidence and fullfillment. What motivates you, how horrible you are or how much potential you have? How our parents deal with our disobedient behavior makes a big difference in how we view ourselves. It is the same with how God parents us. That helps us understand why they Bible talks about God disciplining those He loves (Hebrews 12:6). God wants us to value who we are and see how our sinful nature interferes with us having an abundant life!

Human Beings are born with value and worth, they are still God's creation. However, they are also born with the sinful nature. This sinful nature draws us into choices that create death in our lives. The sinful nature and the work of our adversary, Satan, can wreak havoc with our self esteem. This happens in many forms. It can be our choices that cause us to feel bad about ourselves. The sinful nature of others who devalue us, put us down and disregard our value can cause low self esteem. The enemy reinforces our bad feelings, by trying to get us to agree with these lies about ourselves.

We can remove one of these lies of the enemy by making the distiniction between our value and worth and our sinful nature. Let's battle the sinful nature not believe the lie that we are worthless. God loves and values us and He desires relationship with us. He wants us to accept His gift of redemption so that we might be freed from the slavery of sin. Each of us was created in God's image, that is such an amazing concept. Do you believe you are a magnificent creation?

Christmas Blues

I encounter many who are struggling with the "Christmas Blues" in my practise as a Marriage and Family Therapist. I have had to struggle with my own stress throughout the years when the Christmas Season rolls around. I have found "ways of thinking" that have helped me, my friends and my clients to choose how to manage Christmas Stress.



Our belief system, convictions and expectations create our feelings in every area of life. Asking yourself some questions, can help you discover what your believe Christmas should be about. My Christmas would be wonderful if....? I am suppose to feel ____________at Christmastime? Why do I celebrate Christmas? What do I do with Christmas when I have lost someone I love or have unhappy memories associated at this time of the year?



I held the belief that "I should feel something magical or spiritual at Christmas time because Christmas was about celebrating that Jesus Christ was born on Christmas Day." This belief system used to create guilt feelings, when I wasn't having this "supernatural magical" experience. I heard a sermon about the origins of Christmas that set me free from this guilt. I had never really thought about the origins of Christmas. Christmas is a manmade Holiday. Originally it was a Roman Holiday to celebrate the Saturn God and winter solstice. Emperor Constantine in 336 AD converted it into a Christian Holiday. Historians agree that Christ was not born on December 25th. This took the pressure off that I would somehow be disrespecting God if I was not feeling the wonder of Christ's birth at Christmastime. I do focus more on the Birth of Christ at Christmas, but it is a choice I make, not something I must do.

Now, at Christmastime, I ask God what he is speaking to me at this time of the year rather than try to manufacture my own feelings. This year he has helped me not go into the adrenaline rush of my "To Do List", he has guided me each day as to what to make a priority and what to let go of. The birth of Christ, his life, his death and resurrection and the joy of living a new life in him is something I try to grow (pray and study) in all throughout the year.

Many feel that they should have warm and loving gatherings with family and friends. This typically comes from movies we have seen. Statistically, 95% of us come from dysfunctional families, so we have to factor our families particular dysfunction into the family gathering. If we try to make our family the ideal of something we saw in a Hallmark Card we will absolutely be disappointed.

Some struggle with trusting others and have had problems developing close friendships, so getting together with friends may not be a reality for them. It is important to change this unrealistic expectation to fit the reality of your life. If you choose to get together with your family realize that it will be a mixed experience of emotions. If you don't have the friends you wish you had, make note of that and get to the bottom of why you are struggling in this area. Begin working on creating these meaningful friendships in your life. This area of your life will not change with out choosing to change it.

If you don't have family and friends to spend Christmas with, reaching out and giving to others can be an option. Find organizations and ministries that are giving gifts to poor families or serving the homeless. Giving back and making a difference in other people's lives can help combat lonely feelings. If you have the gift of hospitality, invite over neighbors or other's from your church who don't have Christmas plans to celebrate together. Learn to be creative and think outside the box in creating a meaningful Holiday season.

Those who have encountered losses at Christmastime, first need to make sure they have safe places to grieve, a grief group can be helpful. Also, doing something in memory of a loved one can be helpful. We don't have to deny our loss, acknowledging it does not have to mean we can't have a memorable Christmas, it will be a bittersweet time. Christmas can be both good and bad, it does not have to be one or the other.

How about all the money we spend, and all the pressure we put on ourselves to decorate, send out a Christmas Card or Christmas letter. You can choose how you celebrate Christmas. Spend according to your budget, It really is "the thought that counts". Just because someone buys you a gift does not mean you have to buy them a gift. You are free to decide to buy gifts or not buy gifts, it is up to you. Over the years, our list has gotten smaller amongst the adults, and the other adults in our life have not minded! I am sure it takes pressure off of them to not feel obligated to buy us a gift.

Create Christmas memories for your children that you decide to create. Remember you are teaching them about gratefulness and entitlement in how much money you spend or much you indulge their Christmas wishes. If you are stressed and unhappy your kids will be more impacted by this than all the decorations you have put up or all the money you have spent.

Decide what Christmas means to you, don't let society tell you what it is suppose to mean for you.